About Captain Planet

Lewis "Linkara" Lovhaug is a cool guy who reviews bad comics. I really enjoy his video segment on That Guy With the Glasses, "Atop the Fourth Wall", and recommend y'all check him out.

Anyway, he reviewed a Captain Planet comic...



...which started me reflecting on the show it was based on. This post is adapted from my comment on his video.

I liked Captain Planet and the Planeteers when I was a kid, though I'm fully aware of its flaws now. I guess I just liked anything with action and superheroes, plus the lessons it delivered were in line with my family's values - we were and are a bunch of blue-collar New England Democrats, and respect for the environment is something I believe in.

But the problem, as many people have said, is that Captain Planet slams you over the head with its message, appealing to cheap emotional responses, while getting half of it wrong. I'm basically a socialist, but I'm mature enough to realize that capitalist CEOs aren't mustache-twirling villains - they're human beings just like me, and more often than not believe that they're doing right.

If you want to see what a good environmentalist story looks like, watch Hayao Miyazaki's Princess Mononoke. The proto-capitalist "antagonist" has noble motives and actually helps people in her own way by giving them employment and shelter. The conflict between her and the nature-worshiping protagonists (who can be seen as eco-terrorists) is far from cut-and-dry. Even the nature spirits themselves are not "good" - they're dangerous, alien creatures who can be downright monstrous.

On a less serious note, I always felt sorry for Ma-Ti, the Planeteers' fifth wheel. Everyone always gets down on him for having a stupid ability. What kind of dumb power is Heart, anyway? But when I think about it, he'd potentially be the most powerful of all the Planeteers. I mean, his powers include clairvoyance, telepathy, and mind control. Just think what he could do if he had the imagination - and the ruthlessness - to use that power to its full potential!

If I were writing Captain Planet? I'd set it 15 years in the future, where Ma-Ti has gotten fed up with being the butt monkey of the team. He's become an extremist and used his ring to become a Communist dictator, controlling the hearts and minds of the masses. The other Planeteers struggle against their former friend, but they dare not summon Captain Planet, for without Heart to guide him, the planet's avatar has become a mindless force of destruction, nature's wrath incarnate.

That's what kind of dumb power Heart is!

The Battle for Terra

Here's the trailer for an upcoming animated film, The Battle for Terra.



It's very good to see an American animation studio making a film with a mature, complex storyline. However, it seems like they can't let go of more family-friendly style elements, such as cartoonish character designs. Not that I have a problem with that - I loved The Incredibles - but it clashes with the subject matter. On the other hand, I realize that it's very hard to make realistic 3D character models that don't look downright creepy (see The Polar Express).

I'm afraid that this movie is going to do poorly businesswise, though. The Animation Age Ghetto is still in full effect. Don Bluth's Titan: A. E. failed miserably back in the '90s, and Ralph Bakshi's output is likewise regarded dismally. (This may because Bakshi's work is mostly crap, but I digress.) Sadly, American animation is a long, long way from reaching the widespread acclaim the medium sees in Japan.

Still, as I said, it's good to see someone trying. I wish the filmmakers the best.

Winter Anime Thoughts

Happy New Year, folks!

I'm not as into anime as I used to be. It's mostly a result of having less free time than I used to - I can barely keep up with comics now for the same reason and I've just dropped RPGs as a hobby. I also feel like my tastes have matured a bit, such that I need more than wicked sweet action to keep me entertained for more than five minutes. Even at the height of my interest, though, I never followed the anime "scene" and actively kept an eye on upcoming schedules. I did get sucked into a few series because of their popularity (The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya and Ouran High School Host Club in particular) and ended up watching each episode as it came out, but I don't have the energy to do that nowadays.

That said, I'm looking forward to the coming anime season for the first time I can remember solely because of Axis Powers Hetalia, a webcomic-turned-anime that I was turned onto by chance on TV Tropes Wiki. In a nutshell, it's a series of gags about world history in the last 200-odd years starring various nations anthropomorphized as handsome young men, mostly revolving around the relationship between Germany and Italy, hence the title. It's potentially very offensive in how it skips over all the blood that's been spilled in the World Wars and other conflicts, not to mention the various national stereotypes, but that's mitigated by the fact that the author really knows his history and geopolitics and gives every country his fair share of ribbing. I'm a bit of a history buff so I'm sure I'll get quite a bit out of it, but for various reasons I can't get into the manga, so I'm hoping the anime will give me something to latch onto.

Anyway, I've also taken a look at the rest of the 2009 winter season, which is laid out in this image (which Photobucket has regrettably shrunk). The only things that particularly appeal to me are a remake of the underappreciated mid-90s superhero action anime Birdy the Mighty and a new season of The Slayers, the perennially popular fantasy comedy that's been going strong for nearly two decades. Nothing else jumps out at me as something I'd watch, but one show does stand out for just how utterly braindead its premise is:



That is quite possibly the stupidest idea for a TV show I have ever seen.

I can only wonder how the planning phase of this waste of ink went...

"Hmm. Who's our target demographic, again?"

"Sex-starved male shut-ins with no understanding of women whatsoever!"

"Gotcha. So we need a whole mess of gorgeous, submissive young girls who are inexplicably head-over-heels in love with a nerdy loser and an excuse to shove them all into a contrived romantic plot. What've you got?"

"Okay, so, like, the girls are all actually soda cans, and they need carbon dioxide to survive. And how do they get it? By kissing this guy. It's scientific!"

"Uh... pardon the pun, but are you sure they'll swallow that?"

"As long as we flash some panties every five minutes, they'll swallow anything!"

"...Give this man a raise."

You find some great stuff on DeviantART.

Gurren-Lantern by ~Panhandler on deviantART

Oh Fuck Yes.

Sewiously!

HREMAIL SBEMAIL 200!!!!!!!!!

Featuring John Linnell of They Might Be Giants as the voice of that guy with the big white face and gray body!

The Simpsons Movie

I have a confession to make.

I have never watched a single episode of The Simpsons.

(this is where you gasp and recoil in shock)

Yet due to the extent to which the series has permeated American pop culture (and particularly the Internet nerd/geek subculture), I still know pretty much all there is to know about the show. I know who everyone is. I know the relationships between the characters. I know that Smithers can't get enough of Mister Burns and why Sideshow Bob is public enemy number one. Yet I've never actually sat through a whole episode of the show itself.

So The Simpsons Movie was an odd experience for me in that going in I knew everything on paper but not in practice.

I liked it, honestly, but I get the feeling that I would have liked it more if I'd been tuning in every week for the last twenty years. I've heard it criticized as being like just another episode of the show only extra long, but I wouldn't know. It was sad watching Bart's growing rift with his dad and Homer coming to grips with how much of a jerk he was, but I think I would have gotten more out of it if I'd invested more into the franchise before now.

Still, the movie worked on a more basic level as far as jokes and gags went. ("Of course I'm going mad with power! Have you ever tried going mad without power? It's boring, nobody listens to you.") I had a smile on my face from beginning to end, and that's what matters.

It was also nice to see a successful 2D animated feature film afloat in the sea of lucrative yet mediocre CGI films about wisecracking talking animals that keep getting thrown at us. I like CGI, but not as much as I like traditional animation. They're really separate art forms that should judged by separate standards, so it saddens me that there's this feeling of competition between them.

Anyway, I recommend the movie to pretty much everyone, Simpsons fans and otherwise. Give it a watch if you have the chance - it's worth it.

It's a Rumic World

This one goes out to all the Urusei Yatsura, Ranma 1/2, and Inu-Yasha fans out there:



Apparently this is a preview for an art exhibit titled "It's a Rumic World" that opened today celebrating the anime and manga of Rumiko Takahashi. I'm not as much of a fan as I used to be, but I still hold a soft spot in my heart for Ranma, Akane, Ryōga, and the rest, and it's a joy to see Ranma back in animation - and with his/her original voices to boot, not to mention crossing over with the other Takahashi all-stars.

Sailor Krypton

So is it just me, or is Superman basically every optimistic, idealistic anime girl heroine who Never Gives Up and Believes in the Power of Friendship rolled into one big muscley guy in a cape?



I think so.

More Caramelldansen

Okay, I know this fad has run its course, but I stumbled upon it late and haven't yet gotten tired of it, and dammit it's my blog my rules so whatever.

:)

Three different versions of the "Caramelldansen" video, all pretty well-done and elaborate:

The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya:



The animation is kinda clunky, but I like how it follows the plot of the series.

Lupin the Third:



I have to give this one the highest mark on craftsmanship, not least because it's better-drawn than the cartoon it's based on!

And my favorite... Mobile Police Patlabor:



Dammit, I wish I had a scanner and the right software 'cause I really wanna create a DC Universe Caramelldansen video now...

You Know...

I just now realized, two weeks after it went out of business, the irony of shopping at a comic book store with an obese owner... in Springfield.

*facepalm*

Worst. Joke. Ever.

Yikes!

Wow, my last post got linked to by a couple of blogs with larger readerships than mine (read: greater than 4) and attracted a heck of a lot of responses. I'm not used to that! I mean, I get that I have to expect that when I publish my own writing on a public blog, but man, it's overwhelming! I don't know how Ami or the DJ deal with it. Especially when the attention I attract is negative (correct, but negative), that's just not something I'm prepared for. Well, at least no one's called me names or threatened violence... yet.

Phew.

Well, I just wanted to get that out there.

Watch this video.



"Maybe I'm just imagining things, but you look like you're enjoying yourself."

*nod*

A Shameful Confession

This is kind of hard for me to say, because it could wreak havoc on my reputation as a blogger... but then I realized that I don't have a reputation as a blogger (which is exactly how I want to keep it), so what the hell.

I was surprised to learn that TV Tropes Wiki had such an extensive page on My Little Pony, and even more surprised that I actually remembered pretty much everything on it.

Yes, that's right. I watched and liked My Little Pony when I was a kid.

I'm not proud of it.

I think it came from being a fantasy-obsessed young boy with two little sisters. My Little Pony was pretty much the only thing on the Disney Channel that could sate my addiction in between episodes of Gummi Bears (this was before Aladdin hit the airwaves), and since my sisters were into it, it sorta just rubbed off.

Christ, I even remember liking the all-different "Ponies 90210" series that came later.

I have to say, that giant singing purple ooze from the movie freaked me out. I also remember Danny DeVito had a role in it as some kind of troll thing.

I also remember the creepy Michael Jackson pony mentioned in the article. :P

Side note: I find it interesting that I feel a sense of embarrassment talking about this, because a woman who admits to enjoying Transformers as a child probably wouldn't to the same degree. I could insert a rant about gender-typing here, but I don't have the energy.

Anyway... yeah. Just a strange little look into one blogger's past. Try not to think any less of me for it, huh?

(And for the record I did not play with the dolls. Even I have standards. :P)

Now this is a crossover I can get behind!

This made me laugh out loud:



I guess you have to be versed in both mid-'90s TV cheese and late-night anime to really get it, but... well, Ed as Iolaus, that just cracks me up. XD

In Tennis, Love Means Nothing

Ridiculous over-the-top crap like this is why I love anime:



...what do you mean, it's not awesome?

~~~

Got nothing more to post, I'm afraid. Recent events have left me rather weary and uninspired. Hopefully back up to operating strength in the near future.

A Brief Status Update:

Currently Reading:
Booster Gold
Checkmate
Fullmetal Alchemist
Green Lantern
Green Lantern Corps
Justice Society of America
Lord Havoc and the Extremists (and I'm still not sure why)

Currently Watching:
Strawberry Panic!
Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann

Reviews Currently Planned:
AIR
Lovely Complex
Lucky☆Star
Murder Princess

Books Currently Considering Reading:
Blue Beetle
The Brave and the Bold

Shows Currently Considering Watching:
Clannad
Kanon
Kanon 2006
Maria-sama ga Miteru
Neon Genesis Evangelion (for the second time)
Witchblade ('cause Thom says it's so bad it's good)

"And we cannot fail that trust, and we cannot fail to try."

From the ending of the animated adaptation of Darwyn Cooke's The New Frontier (ignore the subtitles). All I can say is that they nailed it. I honestly can't watch this without getting a little misty, given the juxtaposition of these paragons of idealism against some of the most inspiring political rhetoric of the last century, not to mention the musical score.

I really want to get the special edition DVD but haven't been able to find it.

I'm Too Sexy For My Blog

Sorry I haven't updated in a while. I've been kind of wrapped up with personal stuff at home and at school, and just haven't had the energy. Maybe now that things are warming up outside (I suspect I have mild SAD) I might find the energy to post something substantial in the near future.

But until then, enjoy this music video of clips from Ouran High School Host Club set to Right Said Fred's "I'm Too Sexy."

Anime Reviews: Fushigi Yūgi (SPOILERS)

Okay. Enough with the videos and memes and whatnot. It's time again for a POS -- a Piece Of Sh--

Wait, no.

A Post Of Substance.

...

I think I need a new acronym.

ANYway, I've gotten back into anime lately, so I thought I'd try to put down my thoughts about several series I've been watching lately, if only as a writing exercize. I'll be doing this as a series of reviews (assuming I can keep focused enough to do so), starting with the first new show I viewed this year.



I finished Fushigi Yūgi last month, and I was underwhelmed. It's not easy to write about it since it's no longer fresh in my mind, but I'll try to summarize what I felt was wrong with it.

The thing that really stuck in my craw was the show's constant use of sexual violence as a plot point. The villain turns the heroine's friend against her by convincing the young woman that the heroine abandoned her and allowed her to be raped and he came to her rescue, making him the only person she could trust (in fact he killed her attackers before they could rape her). Later, the same villain has the heroine cornered, threatens her with rape, knocks her out, and tells her that he raped her while she was unconscious (in fact her ill-defined magical powers protected her and zapped him when he tried). After that, not one but two of the villain's henchmen attempt to rape her again! 'Cause only a virgin can use her powers of the ancient bird-god and yadda yadda save the world or something. Why the hell do the gods care about the state of a woman's hymen?

In the end, the only person who actually was raped was the villain himself, when he was a boy, which is apparently why he turned into such an evil bastard. Or something.

All this in a series created by a woman and aimed at teenage girls. Phew.

Another thing that really bothered me was the lack of character development for several of the lead characters. Right up at the end of the series, two of the heroine's companions give their lives to help her, but we in the audience have no reason to care because they'd only been there as background characters and had what felt like less than ten lines between their introductions and their deaths. In fact, all the villain's henchmen end up more developed characters than the heroes! It's shameful.

And the ending... well, without spoiling anything, while reasonably action-packed, it relied too heavily on hastily contrived deus ex machinas.

Finally, the heroine, Miaka, ended up grating on my nerves a great deal. Anime fans will recognize a certain kind of female protagonist: Ditzy, clumsy, gluttonous, and boy-crazy, yet imbued with a bizarre martyr complex and an inexplicable charisma that makes every young man she meets fall head over heels in love with her. She's simultaneously a Mary Sue and a reflection of all the negative character traits young girls hate about themselves (at least as the writers perceive it). It's wholly appropriate that Miaka is voiced by the same actress as Sailor Moon, if you know what I mean.

I don't mean to say that the whole series is garbage because it's not. The first half is well-done, and I liked and cared about most of the main characters a great deal. When two of them died (not the two mentioned above), I was genuinely moved by their sacrifice.

Also, despite being a vile wannabe-rapist, the fact that the villain was basically the Goblin King from Labyrinth scored some points in my book. (This plus the fact that the show's plot is lifted wholesale from The Neverending Story makes me think the creator watched a few too many fantasy flicks in the '80s.)

But none of that saves Fushigi Yūgi from winding up as a wholly mediocre viewing experience. I've read some of the other works by creator Yū Watase, and I can say that in my opinion her best work is done when she ditches the pretentions at writing a great epic and just sticks to what she knows: Wish-fulfillment fantasies about dorky girls surrounded by hot guys who inexplicably love them, nothing more, nothing less.

Next up: Lucky☆Star.

Two Things

First of all, I found this image chuckle-worthy. It's from the guy who does Nodwick, and is apparently from a t-shirt:

.

Secondly, from the man who brought you Macbeth 2: The Reckoning, Twelfth Night of Blood, and The Merry Werewolves of Windsor, the rock-'em-sock-'em actionfest of the season...

They Don't Make 'em Like This Anymore

I'm pretty busy with school starting and all, so I don't have the energy for a meaningful post. So I'm just gonna sit back and enjoy this vid of some classic mecha-vs.-mecha action from my favorite anime, Mobile Police Patlabor.



Man, those were the days, when all you needed was a giant robot and some fighting spirit...

And I'm totally crushing on Noa Izumi. Just saying. She's too cool, and cute to boot.